Blossom

 

Photo by Kaboompics.com

Hope is the seed planted that grew into a tree that few expected to blossom. But now it provides fruit and comfort to all those who need a safe space to unwind. 

Love always, Esha  

Small Victories

 
Take the time to put the work in. People may not see it. Those who do may not respect it. But in the end your blood, sweat and tears will pay off. Because hard work is its own reward and the skills you cultivate from perfecting your craft will mean more than an easy road to success. The beautiful of life is in the journey. Enjoy the small victories. 

Love always, Esha 

Warning: For Those Who Grieve

Photo by Ksenia Chernaya

There are no words 

To fill the void 

It is an endless sea 

Of missed communication

And broken opportunities

How do I move forward? 

How do I forget? 

How do I cry? 

Now that you're gone 

Your things fill the room, storage and my mind 

Vestiges of the life 

You left behind

For the first time 

Your not here to wipe my tears 

They fill the rims of my dry eyes

Bubbling to the surface

Like a pop can that was shaken 

And opened to soon  

Where is your shoulder to cry on?

Where can one go to find your love? 

The contour of your face 

Was the comfort that tired consciences rested on 

There are tangled grey wires 

At the base of my swollen red heart 

Unable to hold the contents 

Of a soul tore apart

It pumps the same 

But it aches different

It pleads for a love far gone

Begging for attention in a world 

That pays no mind 

How do I move forward? 

How do I forget? 

How do I cry? 

Now that you're gone

The mouth says, I'm well 

Fingertips text, I'm fine 

But deep down a stomach twisted in knots 

Burns with a throbbing

That only the grieving know 

When death darkens a humble doorstep

An unraveling spirit will gladly go home 

Let the white picket fence fade into the background 

Clouds hover in weightless air 

They appear and disappear 

As the light of a glistening dawn opens 

For those chained in the shackles of mourning 

Morning after morning freed from the torment 

Of a breaking heart that stays broke 



Love always, Esha 

ReplyForward

Long Way

Photo by Brett Jordan

Every time I'm convinced that I should give up. I'm pulled back in. Shaken and stirred by your love. Encouraged by your grace. Strengthened by your patience. Moved by your kindness and love. Surrounded by your beauty. And reminded in your word that I'm not alone. Jesus has brought me a mighty long way. 


Love always, Esha 

Fortress

 

Photo by Pixabay

The storm won’t last

You will prevail

God is in the midst

He is your fortress

Love always, Esha 

Dream Work

I do my Father's work

Foraging my dreams from clay

Breathing the breath of life into dirt

No matter how long it takes 

I'm gonna hustle till it hurts  

And even in the midst of battle 

I will put God first 

 

Love always, Esha  

 

Photo by Jess Bailey Designs on Pexels.com

I want to paint this neat picture of myself sometimes. By portraying a person that doesn’t exist but that’s not me. I’m honest to a fault. I can’t run be hid filters. I’m not afraid to show my imperfections because I spend my time trying to overcome them or learning to love them. So this is another side of me. I hope you like it.

Lately, I’ve had the oddest feeling. It’s as though I don’t want any of the things I once thought were important. At first, I thought that it was my duty to get married and have children. To live a life of tradition by building a family. But my heart no longer craves a partner. My soul has borne the grief of trying to make things work for too long. I have stained more pillow cases with bitter tears than I can count. And after my Father died, I longed for a love that I could hold onto that would hold me in return. Instead, I came home to the misery of a lover that I couldn’t trust. That utilized silent treachery. Keeping his thoughts and the content of his heart far from me.

For a decade, I ran from loneliness always clinging to the arm of someone that cared nothing for me so I wouldn’t have to be alone at night. Until I was backed into a corner and forced to spend time with myself. I have spent most of this year looking at my eating habits, career, prayer life, inspecting my personal goals and reviewing the breadth of my existence. Has my presence made this world a better place in any way? Or have I been selfish and self concerned? How do I treat people with the kindness that I desire to be treated with? Where do I go from here?

I don’t have the answers I seek. But I know that this upcoming year, I will continue to do the spiritual work that it takes to grow as a person. There is no relationship or friendship that will heal the pain I refuse to address or acknowledge. I was bullied constantly as a child and a teenager. It left me drained and searching for an identity that would keep me safe in a cruel world. So at times, I’m too tough or I freeze looking for words that are acceptable. Because deep down… I have always felt hated for being outspoken.

Though I may always be opinionated and a bit over dramatic I will continue to speak the truth. I don’t mind calling out my own flaws in the process. Because Jesus has granted me the grace and mercy to move past my indiscretions and forgive myself. And I look forward to the day, when I look back and laugh at the things that once made me cry. Because they taught me lessons that money can’t buy. Thank you for reading.

Love always, Esha  <3